Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
