i wish starbucks made bloody marys
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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