is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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