it hurts more in the daytime
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
