Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
and i looked up. we had an audience...
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
My vagina is officially offended.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
