i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
