We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
