He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
