I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
