she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
