i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
