why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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