Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
