It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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