I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
