I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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