You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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