Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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