just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize