Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize