DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
