but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
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I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
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I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.