Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
