And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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