i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
