I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
