Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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