Well douche your snatch and let's go!
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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