I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
