Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I need to wash the frat house off of me
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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