There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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