Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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