sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
