and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Can't talk, ducks in the car
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
