But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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