ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
