yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
