i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
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