I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
