Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
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I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
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"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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