Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
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In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
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Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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