Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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