just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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