bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
