I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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