I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize
