i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
