just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
