my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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