"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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