my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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